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Toni Killefer: Project 10
Slideshow by Julia Kim Smith
156 views since November 20, 2008.
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1 of 13
1. my face (daily)
This hat from a friend came in the mail the day before chemo started. It sums up how I feel but don't want to say out loud.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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9. something red
My world has shrunk to my couch. It is often filled with family and friends. I photographed it empty because no matter how many people are around you to love and provide support, you still go through this alone.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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3. who I love
Reason #1 to be a cancer survivor: Ellen, 9 (Reason #2: Ian, 6 and Reason #3: Ned, 3)
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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9. something red
The night before chemo my youngest son split his head open and had to get stitches. It was supposed to be a quiet, restful evening. Random things happen no matter how carefully I am watching. It helps to ground me.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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5. my favorite view
I feel that everything around me is so alive and blooming just as I am getting ready to kill off everything in me. Instead of enjoying the beauty, I am contemplating the irony.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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4. a place that hurts
Radiation burn. It made me feel like an animal caught in a trap. The pain was constant, relentless.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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9. something red
This is my iPod, something that helps me relax. I accidentally put it through the washer. It was the straw that broke the camel's back. I managed not to cry over chemo. My iPod not working caused sobbing.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
10 of 13
Someone told my daughter that people judge you by your fingernails. As a parent, but as a cancer patient also, I want my kids to see people for who they are not what they look like. I want them to understand compassion.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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3. who I love
No matter how bad I felt, I still had to get up to care for the dog and the kids. My dog never left my side. He knew I was sick.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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something I am proud of
Last year in April or May I wanted to buy a gas grill. I decided not to because I wouldn't be around long enough to enjoy it. This April I bought a gas grill. They last 10 to 15 years with proper care.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith
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9. something red
STOP thinking about it. STOP talking about it. STOP letting cancer rule my thoughts and life. I feel I'm finished with it and ready to move on.
From Toni K
Photo by juliakimsmith